Going into my vasectomy, I was much more concerned with the pain afterwards, and the length of the recovery. But the worst part about the whole experience ended up being the vasectomy procedure itself.
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It always comes up when we talk about "being polyamorous" which I actually really am starting to loathe the term. Why do we have to put a label on it? Because we all like labels. They make us feel comfortable.
Gay, strait, dominant, submissive, winner, loser, divorced, separated, right-handed, republican, entrepreneur….
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Saying, “You’re so lucky” is an easy way to look at someone that you envy and justify why you’re not also happy and fulfilled.
The reality is - we did the work and created this for ourselves.
The best part is: you can do it, too.
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I had a revelation when I applied the basic principles of attachment parenting to adult intimate relationships. MIND BLOWN. And now, I'll share it with you.
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Hey men, you wanna see some pathetic shit? Go and set up a fake OkCupid profile as a female, and watch your inbox rapidly fill with the most awful garbage you have ever read. Actually, don’t do that because that’s a little weird, just read this article instead. You'll learn how not to be a douche bag on Tinder and other online dating sites.
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Over the past few years I have encountered lots of people who claim to be polyamorous only to hear them explain a few minutes later that their definition of poly means they live at home with a spouse and children, and occasionally they go on dates and/or have sex with another person on the side who never meets the spouse and never knows the family. This is not the same thing as polyamory, this is simply an open relationship, and I feel like the two often get lumped together in a very confusing and frustrating way.
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I think that the whole concept of the American Dream is complete horse shit. Go to college, get married, have a family, work really really hard and then retire and enjoy your golden years. I mean - none of that works for me, but especially the concept of having to work hard.
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Last summer, my girlfriend Katie and I stayed in Budapest, Hungary. While we were researching Hungarian society, we learned that sex work is legal and all sex workers are part of a union, are covered by state funded healthcare, receive regular checkups, testing, and other support from the government. Brothels or pimping is illegal, which allows all sex workers to remain in complete control of their situations and their money.
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A more “mainstream” title for my partner and I could be “polyamorous” or “in an open relationship”, in all honesty -- we don't resonate with any of those titles anymore. We've started saying "relationship anarchists" or simply just "none of your business". It seems putting a label on something only serves to encourage other people to pre-judge and decide they already know who you are without actually getting to know you.
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