That One Time My Girlfriend And I Got Side-By-Side Erotic Massages In Budapest
Last summer my girlfriend Katie and I spent four weeks in Budapest, Hungary. While researching Hungarian society, we learned that sex work is legal and all sex workers are:
- part of a union
- covered by state funded healthcare
- receive regular checkups, testing, and other support from the government
PLUS -- Brothels or pimping is illegal, which allows all sex workers to remain in complete control of their situations and their money.
So in light of all this, I decided to see if there were some things I could check off my sex bucket list while we were there.
In case you don’t already know, Katie and I are not monogamous which, among other things, makes mutually agreed upon random sexual exploits such as this a normal part of our relationship. Initially I had in mind that she might be an active part of the activities, but she wasn’t really into that as her bucket list is rather different from mine. She was into the idea of watching from around the corner -- a voyeuristic point of view.
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I found a massage parlor that promoted themselves as being very adept at the art of sensual massage and stated straight up that the happy endings were a standard part of the service included in the price, and did not need to be negotiated with the practitioners. I liked the sound of that.
The next day we visited their location to make an appointment and Katie came along to keep me company and make sure the place seemed safe and legit. Once we entered, we were both put very much at ease. We were expecting the stereotypical neon lights, crappy decoration, and a general element of sleaze. But instead it was all very elegant and comfortable.
We were greeted by a lovely hostess -- she introduced herself and explained how the process worked, what the services were, and how much they cost. She was confident, well spoken, and again, very professional. And in her cute little broken-English voice she says to Katie “I happen to be the only one here that can make yoni massage, would you like me to make yoni massage on you?”
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I looked over at her and was a bit surprised when Katie said “yes, I would love to schedule an appointment with you.” We both thought it was funny that when we arrived at this place, Katie wanted nothing to do with it, and by the time we left she was as excited about getting a massage as I was.
A week later we were back for our appointments. It was sort of an interesting thing to be introduced to some random beautiful woman that in 30 minutes was going to be giving me a hand-job, but what the hell I guess, this is what I signed up for. They led us into a room with candle-lit lighting, elegant paintings on the wall and other nice decorations. There was a thick queen-size mat on the floor that was perfect for the two of us. They told us both to take all our clothes off and lie face down on the mattress and they would be back in in a few minutes.
They came back into the room and started massaging our feet, slowly working up our legs and backs and then had us both turn over. Eventually she started gently tickling my genitals, and things started moving in the right direction again, but I was still not fully aroused or erect and I was starting to wonder why. I had also come to the realization that all the time I had spent scouring the website, trying to determine the perfect practitioner for me was completely unnecessary because it turns out my eyes were pretty much closed the entire time. It really wouldn’t have mattered at all who was working on me.
Right about this time I heard Katie start breathing a lot heavier, and then less than a minute later she had a big orgasm. It was very clear at that point that the woman who “makes yoni massage” knew exactly what she was doing.
And suddenly I came to a few more realizations:
- The pressure was now on me, as they were all waiting on me to have my orgasm
- Getting jerked off by a complete stranger doesn’t actually help the process go any faster
- I can’t do anything myself to help the process along.
I couldn’t say anything, or physically engage my practitioner. I simply had to lay there passively and hope she figured it all out. Which she did. Eventually I came, it seemed like it took forever, but really it was just a few minutes. Then she cleaned me up and the two women left the room.
We just laid there, both of us totally blissed out. I realized that, even though it did not go as well as I had thought, getting a great professional massage followed by an orgasm is a fantastic experience and it’s a shame it’s not more mainstream.
On the walk home we spent the whole time going back over the experience from each others perspective. It became apparent that in the end, Katie ended up having a much more enjoyable experience than I did. Which again was funny considering that I was the one driving the boat the whole time and that initially she had no desire to take part in this venture at all.
It turns out that for me, the dynamic was not ultimately what I was looking for. At the very least I think it would have been better if we were in separate rooms, only because then I wouldn’t have had the added pressure of the other two sitting there waiting for me to finish. I also think I would have gotten much more enjoyment from an experience where I didn’t have to remain completely passive. I wanted to be able to share our energy and have a two-way exchange. Meanwhile Katie stayed completely present in her experience, and loved every minute of it. Her practitioner was indeed very adept and her soft feminine touch was exactly what Katie was looking for.
In the end we both agreed that it was totally worth the mere $60 each and, despite my pressure to orgasm: we’d do it again and were very grateful to have been exposed to such a sex-positive culture. To see how a society can embrace sexuality without any shame attached to it was really fantastic. It was great to acknowledge that sex is healthy, and sex workers and sex work should not be treated with the level of shame and disdain that it is. We could all learn a few things from progressive countries like this.