How quickly things can change

Right now I'm sitting on a comfy couch in an Airbnb north of Las Vegas tripping out at how strange it feels to not sleep in my own bed. 

Due to the dark pit that was 2017, we haven't left our house or Phoenix in 18 months. That's a really long time to be "stuck". In the grand scheme of life it's just another deep dark valley amidst the peaks, but when you're in it -- a year and a half is a fuck of a long time. 

Last week we were in Tucson for a night staying at a friend's house so Kris could do a quick I.T. gig in town. We arrived at lunchtime and our friend was hungry. He asked if we wanted to go out since he didn't have any food in the house. I was just blunt and said, "We can go out if you want to buy us lunch!" Not having food in the house, for us, is not an option and we had brought a cooler of food with us to Tucson. 

When you have very little money and don't know where your next paycheck is coming from -- you don't have the option of not having food in the house or eating out or grabbing food on the road. Because it's expensive to eat that way. We are so very used to it at this point that we don't give it a second thought. It just is. 

Our friend of course took us out to lunch because that's not a big deal to him at all. I remarked that I could count on one hand how many times Kris and I had sat down at a restaurant: a foreign concept to most as dining out is a regular occurrence for most. At one point the friend asked if we were bored -- a funny question because we weren't at all. I said it was just good to be out because we don't get out much. He asked why and I had to think about it, but it's because most normal, everyday social interactions happen over food. You go out to lunch with a friend, you meet some coworkers for drinks, you get breakfast after a hike on Saturday. 

Nothing like that is on our radar because we've been so used to not doing anything like that for so long. But it is strange to most people. Because those things are extremely normal for most people. Mostly for us it's a conscious choice and we don't think about it too much -- we have big goals and are just used to living this way in the name of all the shit we're trying to make happen that's way more important than paying $12 for a cocktail. 

But at the same time -- it sucks sometimes and is like living in an alternate reality that nobody understands. 

We're in Vegas for another work gig Kris had. The plane tickets, Airbnb and Turo rental are paid for and he gets a daily per diem for food. We spent that at the grocery store so that I could eat, too and it wouldn't cost us extra. A friend heard we were going and rattled off a list of places to go. The turo rental gal who delivered the car did the same thing. I wanted to reiterate -- we are in Vegas because all expenses are paid. The only eating we'll be doing is with the Trader Joe's food we bought with the per diem money. 

That was actually really fucking exciting. It's $55 a day and that will get you a fuck of a lot of fun stuff at Trader Joe's. For us -- this whole trip is exciting. A car nicer than we'd ever rented, a higher end Airbnb, fancy groceries. We're easily pleased and living simply is our nature. 

I am very excited though at the prospect of not having to live quite so simply. Of being able to do simple things like bring home flowers or impulse purchase fancy nuts. We flew a cheap, regional airline from Phoenix to Vegas and it was very similar to the budget local European airlines we sometimes fly when we're over there. 

A week from Sunday we will be on a first class flight from Phoenix to L.A., and then a premium flight from L.A. to London for the summer. 

And just like that. We'll be out of here. Reminded of how quickly things can change.